Friday, July 30, 2010

Fruity Friday Funny

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This week we have a very nutritional Fruit and Vegetable Friday Funny that we have prepared especially for all of you. Oranges are certainly a fruit that is supposed to be very good for us, and so let's start with a rather special orange.

This particular orange has really put some Vitamin C into YouTube lately, and squeezed out millions of views. For some reason, this guy is called "The Annoying Orange", so let's begin to find out why.



The above video has had over 26 million views, and the animation and character development all through eye and mouth movements are nothing short of phenomenal. (More of the annoying orange dude later).

Here are some good old fashioned fruit and vegetable "knock knock" jokes.

Vegetable Knock Knock Jokes

Knock, Knock

Who’s there?
Lettuce
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in please, We're very cold!

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Turnip
Turnip who?
Turnip the radio please!

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Bean
Bean who?
Bean a while since I last saw ya!

There are many more "Annoying Orange" videos on YouTube, but this one with the Pot of Gold Lepricorn getting the living daylights annoyed out of him is a particular favourite:



Two Irish potatoes were sitting on a chopping board.
"I’m about to change my nationality" one said to the other
"How?" the other potato asked
"By becoming French fries!"

Fruity Jokes

Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor?
A: Because it wasn’t peeling well

Q: What did the apple skin say to the apple?
A: I’ve got you covered

Q: What is a vampire's favourite fruit?
A: A neck-tarine!

Q: Why did the lemon cross the road?
A: To make lemon squash!

Q: Why did the Tomato go out with a prune?
A: Because he couldn't find a date!

The "Annoying Orange" videos are not just silly shallow slap stick comedy, but cover all subjects, cultures, and genres. A classic example is this horror movie annoying orange video:



Surely you would have to be a real donkey, (or maybe a fruity donkey), not to like the Annoying Orange?

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Now for our last Annoying Orange video, which is a great parody of the classic movie "Back to the Future".



And just in case you haven't got your fill of Fruit and vegetable jokes yet, here are a few more.

Vegetable Jokes - Part 2

Q: How do you make an artichoke?
A: Strangle it

Q: What’s the fastest vegetable?
A: A runner bean

Q: What is small, round and giggles a lot?
A: A tickled onion

Q: What’s the strongest vegetable?
A: A muscle sprout

Q: How do you fix a broken tomato?
A: Tomato paste!

Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?
A: Quit stalking me.

Q: What did the apple say to the bug?
A: Stop bugging me!!!!!!

Q: Why did the tomato blush?
A: Because he saw the salad dressing.

Q: What do you call a retired vegetable?
A: A has-bean.

Q: What happens to grapes when you step on them?
A: The wine.

Q: What do you call an angry pea?
A: Grump-pea.

No wonder the pea was angry. What with people saying all sorts of nasty stuff about him like this:

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Here is a video by another Fruit and vedgy star of YouTube called "Killer Bean" :



Vegetable Jokes - Part 3

Q: What do you call a fast fungus?
A: A mush-vroom.

Q: Why was the mushroom invited to lots of parties?
A: Because he was a fungi to be with!

Q: Why did the orange stop at the top of the hill?
A: Because it ran out of juice!

Q: What do chickens grow on?
A: Eggplants.

Q: What is small, red and whispers?
A: A hoarse radish.

Q: How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
A: With a pumpkin patch!

Q: Why is a pea small and green?
A: If it was large and red it would be a fire engine!

Q: How did the farmer fix his jeans ?
A: With a cabbage patch!

Now for our final video of "Killer Bean". This one starts off tame enough with a bit of MJ Dancing, but then later degenerates into some full on Matrix style mayhem.




Vegetable Jokes - Part 4

Q: What do you call two banana peels?
A: A pair of slippers

Q: What did the Mama melon say to the baby melons boyfriend?
A: You Cant-Eloupe

Q: What did the baby corn say to the Mum corn?
A: Where's Popcorn

Q: Where do baby apes sleep?
A: In apricots

Q: What game do elephants love to play?
A: Squash

So that's it for another week here at Passy's World.

Think I need to squeeze me some fresh orange juice for breakfast, and get myself outdoors to weed the vegetable patch this weekend!

Enjoy,
Big Passy Wasabi

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Interesting Percentages

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Hmmm...there seems to be something drastically wrong with the math here.
No wonder we can't see any shoppers in the carpark!

This post is about some of the interesting percents we found while searching the web to create an assignment sheet for one of our Mathematics classes. (The final assignment and answers are contained later in this post).

Here is a nice little PowerPoint from Slideshare by Natalie Hughes, that gives a great overview of Percentages.

Percentages are a very important part of our modern world. They are used in Economics, Cooking, Health, Sport, Mathematics, Science, Jewellery, Geography, Health and Exercise, Medicine, and many other areas.

Percents add a common understandable meaning to results. For example, saying that 25% of drivers breath tested had been drinking, (which means 1 in 4 drivers), is a lot easier to understand than saying 241 out of 967 drivers were drinking.

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Interesting Percentages
  • A jellyfish is 95 percent water.
  • More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call.
  • Only 55 percent of all Americans know that the sun is a star.
  • About 70 percent of Americans who go to college do it to make more money.
  • 44% of kids watch television before they go to sleep.
  • 70 percent of an adult's body is made up of water.
  • There are some ice creams that are 75% air.
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Now eating all that ice cream is sure going to taste good, but what about the subsequent unhealthy weight gain ?


Body Fat Percentage

A basic "Skin Pull Caliper Test" along with a lookup table can enable you to quickly determine your "Body Fat Percentage".

A Great Body Fat Percentage and Weighing Yourself explanatory video by the legendary Darin Steen is this one:



Here are some body fat percentage guidelines for men and women:

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Image Source: http://www.calculatebodyfatpercentage.com

Q. Why is the healthy body fat percentage for women always higher than that for men ?

A. Women require more body fat for Child Bearing purposes.


So to get rid of that unhealthy fat build up, we are going to need to do some regular exercise that raises our heart rate up to a level where we can burn off some fat.


Heart Rate Percentages

There is actually a certain speed we are supposed to get our heart up to, for exercise to be beneficial.

This heart rate is often called our "Training Heart Rate", or "Target Heart Rate".


The basic mathematics behind this is that your Maximum Heart Rate (MHR) is 220 minus your age.

You then need to do your workout at below this rate at a "Target Heart Rate" that is a certain % of your MHR.


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Find out a whole lot more about healthy weight mathematics at this previous Passy World blog post:

The Mathematics of Being Healthy


Percentages in Jewelery

There are an endless number of interesting percentages on the web.

Did you know for example that:


"14 carat gold" = 58.33% Gold, 14% to 28% Copper, and 4% to 28% Silver

and


"White Gold"
= 75 to 85% Gold, 8 to 10% Nickel, and 2 to 9% Zinc.


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Here are some percentage statistics about Pornography on the Internet:
  • 25% of total search engine requests are porn-related. (Top three searches: sex, mp3 and hotmail.)
  • 8% of total emails are porn-related. Average daily pornographic emails are 4.5 per internet user.
  • 12% of total websites are pornographic.

There is definitely a lot of kinky stuff going on with a certain percentage of Internet users:

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And here is a final slideshow. It is all about percentage increases in wages - wouldn't we all like to see a bit more of that in the real world!


Here is a worksheet that involves internet research by students to investigate a number of interesting percentages:



If you would like to have your own full size copy of this PDF, then simply click the save disk icon button on the PDF viewer, and you should be able to save it to your own hard disk.

Alternatively, you can view or save the full size PDF by clicking the link below:



And you can also click the link below if you would like to see the Answers to the assignment:



So that's us about 99% done here, and we hope that you have yourself a 100% day today.

Enjoy,
Big Passy Wasabi

Friday, July 23, 2010

Look Around You Friday Funny

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The "Look Around You" series of videos on YouTube are a send up of the old boring type of educational videos that many of us older folks had to watch when we went to high school.

Some of them are not outrageously funny, but they are certainly good for a quiet little chuckle. I guess you will either like them or you won't.

The best way to find out is to watch some footage, and so let's get started,

The first video is all about "Laws", and so have your copybooks ready, look around you, and watch carefully!



This next video is all about one of my favorite subjects: Mathematics.

It was actually this video which a fellow Mathematics Teacher showed me, that made me become aware of the "Look Around You" series of videos.



And moving onto some more advanced Mathematics, (commonly known as "Physics"), here is a great little refresher course on Newton's Laws:



The following video examines the future technology of health. Will computers and robots be able to take over and look after us?

The video takes a good look around at the possibilities and prospects.



Now I guess you are all wondering what the outcome was of Medibot's first attempt at plastic surgery.

Well the following video shows the astonishing results.
(Warning this video does contain some graphically bad language).




And for our final look around at future technologies, let's take a look at "The Petticoat Computer" especially for the Ladies:




There are plenty more of the "Look Around You" series of videos on You Tube. However, they may or may not be your cup of tea.

So if you didn't like any of these videos, then may we suggest that you look around you on Google and YouTube for something else that you do find funny.

Looking around me, I just realised that the sun is shining and I should be outside doing other stuff.

Enjoy,
Big Passy wasabi

Friday, July 16, 2010

Soccer Kicked Friday Funny

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You know when it comes right down to it, Soccer is best described by this famous quote: "Soccer is a game in which a handful of men run around for one and a half hours watched by millions of people who could really use the exercise".
(Source: http://www.soccerjokes.com)

It certainly is a funny old game, as we shall see.

So let's get the ball rolling with a fantastic compilation video from YouTube:




Soccer is a fairly skilled sport by all accounts, and I suppose you've either got it, or you don't.

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and this guy is certainly flat out defending his goals:

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Soccer certainly started out with some very humble and painful beginnings:

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And even in these modern times, there still seems to be some excruciatingly painful moments for some of its biggest fans:

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Here is another great soccer video showing some marvelous referee work, followed by some classic soccer bloopers:



One of the hardest gigs in soccer, apart from being a Goalie, would have to be the referee's job. So why on earth would anyone want to become a referee?

Reasons to Become a Referee

  • You love football, but can't quite understand the rules.
  • You have the strange desire to run aimlessly around in the wind, rain and snow.

  • You love the sound of verbal abuse.
  • You find it hard to make decisions, and whatever you do is always wrong.

Source: http://www.soccerjokes.com


And so many people are so unhappy with the referee's decisions. They are also not afraid to emphatically show their disdain, no matter what their age:

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Hmmm... looks like they need Tarzan of the Jungle to referee this bizarre soccer match:

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So let's just have one last joke about referees:

Q. Did you hear about the England international player who had a date with a referee's daughter?

A. She penalised him three times - for handling, for interference, and for trying to pull off a jersey.

(Source: http://www.soccerjokes.com)

And for our next video, let's have a look at how players can sometimes get themselves into very awkward positions:




Finally there is one last thing we need to examine for a complete picture of the sport of soccer: The Offside Rule:

The Offside Rule Explained

The offside rule is there to attract to football those people who can already explain how to play cricket.

A player is offside if they are nearer to the opponent's goal line than both the ball and the second last player - except on alternate Saturdays when in addition the second last player must be facing in the opposite goals direction in which the ball is directed.

A player is not offside if they are in their own half of the field, or they are level with the second last opponent, or the player, opponent and referee form a triangle as perceived by an imaginary linesmen positioned on the Celestial Meridian.

All offside regulations are immediately found to be in favour of the defending team if shortly after the ball is played they all stop, in unison, and raise their right arm to the linesman and appeal for an offside decision.

(Source: http://www.soccerjokes.com)

It is great to be back from our awesome holiday to the USA.
We will put up some holiday pictures in a future post.

Enjoy,
Big Passy Wasabi